Am I the only one that owns at least six pairs of readers? Is that normal? I find myself in a panic if I don’t have at least two pairs in my purse, a pair on my desk at work and at least three pairs stored in random places in the house. When I get down to about four pairs, I’m off to Costco to buy a three-pack. I’m starting to think this has less to do with my eyesight and more to do with my every decreasing memory and how I frequently leave my glasses in odd places. We once found a pair on the K-cup spinner in my office. As stated previously, dementia is knocking on my door. Fortunately, I can’t see the door knob to let it in.

Yesterday, I started wishing a friend “Happy Birthday” on Facebook. I can’t remember if I was doing that ‘reader-less’ or just truly got sidetracked but somehow ended up wishing Happy Birthday…to myself…on my Facebook page. This utterly confused my friends and family as I have been consistently celebrating my birthday in November since…my actual birth. I had to stop and think for a minute…when is my birthday again? Oh yes…when Kennedy was shot – rumor has it that the tragedy sent my mother into labor.  If I was born in June, it would either have been a very…very…long labor or my mother had ESP. I decided to just go with it and wished myself a Happy 53 1/2 Birthday. This was after I had to do some math since I never can seem to remember how old I am anymore.

I think my cognition and eyesight are in constant competition to see who can make me Where Are Those Glasses Anyway-look more foolish. Situations have arisen with coworkers needing help with something, prompting me to run back to my desk for my glasses, only to get distracted by…something shiny or a random squirrel running past. Eventually, my coworkers will come back into my office, grab me and my glasses in hand, and lead me back to the problem, which is typically solved very quickly once I can see it…and there are no squirrels.

I am blessed to be surrounded by people that still find my lack of eyesight or short term memory somewhat endearing. I won’t say, however, that I don’t have my concerns at times. Names escape me, as do some words when I’m teaching. I usually turn it into a game – “Ok, students – there is a word for that.  What is it?” Someone will inevitably yell out either the right word or one that leads down a whole other conversation. Either way, the lesson gets taught and at least when I’m teaching a Gerontology class, I feel that I’m providing a live case study.

So, I’ll keep my 6 pairs of glasses on hand, and I think start picking up some Sudoku or Crosswords. I hear that if you don’t use it, you lose it. Since the eyesight is already gone, I would like to hang onto some form of cognition, if for no other reason but to allow me to find the glasses!  Hmmm…I’m down to four pairs…off the Costco!

Posted by:Sheri Saretsky

I spent ten years as a single parent of three boys. I then married my wonderful husband and he was inducted into the world of boy raising. Now we get to add my peri-menopause to the mix! Its been a crazy life...one I wouldn't change a minute of....

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